You only give me your Funny Paper

March 13, 2020 The collector stared longingly at his prized piece of Beatles memorabilia, lovingly encased in a Plexiglas display box. He’d bought the item on a lark back in 1980, but had grown inexplicably fond of it over the past forty years. It had come with a certificate of authenticity from Ken Townsend, the […]

Your Song will Fill the Air

“I’m so tired. I haven’t slept a wink!” complained Warrant Officer John Ripley. “You’ve slept plenty in stasis,” retorted Captain Tamara Dallas. “And now it’s time to start a new mission.” “I thought we were supposed to stay in stasis until we were within spitting distance of Earth,” protested Joan Kane, Executive Officer of the […]

A Séance in the Dark

Ringo lifted his right hand to rap on the door, then hesitated. He held it in front of his face for a few seconds and examined it in the warm golden light of the sunset. His favorite sapphire ring was so tight on his pinkie finger that it practically cut off his circulation. But he […]

Man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allen Poe

A low rumble of thunder reverberated through the closed windows of the silver Bentley. Ringo cast an anxious glance at the ominous grey sky through the car’s front windshield. “Please tell me we’re almost there,” he begged his estate agent, Rowena Montresor. “Almost,” she assured him. She lifted her left hand off the steering wheel […]

All the Money’s Gone, Nowhere to Go

Ringo leaned against the grimy brick wall and stared longingly at the peddler’s cart. He hadn’t eaten a thing since he’d run away from the workhouse the previous afternoon, and he was starving. Last night he’d been too terrified to even think about food. Curled up in the cramped, smelly doorway of an abandoned flophouse […]

Carry Me Back to the Days I Knew Then

John smiled wistfully at the name inscribed on the headstone. “I had a cat called Tim when I was young,” he said. “He lives with my Aunt Mimi still.” “Aye, Tim’s a fine name for a pet,” replied Angus MacGregor. He nodded politely at John, then pointed his flashlight at another grave marker in the […]

Meet the Beadles

A bright shaft of sunlight shone into the crowded public house through the open door, heralding the knight’s arrival. “Good day to you all, my fellow Christians!” he called out, raising both of his hands in a thumbs-up greeting. All eyes in the dimly-lit tavern turned towards the handsome nobleman as he strode purposefully across […]

Little Quarrymen

“Now, what do you think the author is trying to say in this passage from the text?” George Martin asked the four teenagers gathered in a circle around him. “That if the Pilgrim progresses any further, he’s going to get horrible bunions on his feet,” proposed the bespectacled student sitting to his right. The boy […]

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